I'd been looking forward to this moment for ages, five-and-a-half years to be precise. And when the mighty Tractor Boys (thank you, I accept your sympathy) were pencilled in to play a pre-season friendly against our local side Notts County, I couldn't resist, partly because it was a cheaper way to indulge my wish. I was excited, he was excited. We were going to spend a whole afternoon together, just the two of us.
So was I devastated when he didn't enjoy the game and, after 35 minutes declared that we were going home? No, I was indulging my pastime, not his. If he gave up on something he loved, I would've been disappointed.
I've learnt a big lesson this week about understanding what he wants and how he sees life. Because last week he told me all about a world that he inhabits with strange creatures with weird-sounding names that go on special missions and grow plants that allow them to capture smaller creatures that they put in a zoo. Confused? So was I. There was only one way for me to understand the world that he lives in. I had to become a part of it. I took the step and leapt into his universe.
I adopted a Moshi Monster.
It was enlightening.
Now I understand why he won't come off the computer when we tell him to. Now I get why he ignores us when we tell him he has 5 minutes left. It's a highly addictive (yet very educational) game of number, logic, trivia and word puzzles and growing, collecting and nurturing assets. It's great for storytelling, business analogies and creating and nurturing friendships.
So now we sit next to each other, me on my laptop and him on DW's netbook, entering Monstro City together to play the Daily Challenge or a round of Mosh Fling (shooting a small, furry creature out of a cannon to see how far it will go). We get time together and have a mutual interest and, most of all, I see things from his point of view.
I'm happy to point you towards this interview between Tony Robbins and the late Stephen Covey, in which the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People author explains that we need to make whatever's important to our children important to us. I'm looking forward to being led into new worlds and strange, new civilisations and revisiting one that I was missing - childhood.
A former salesman, Declan now dedicates his time to the written word. He has edited and written for a number of TV magazines and also writes for the blog and weekly newsletter at http://www.moretimefordads.com It is Declan's wish that everyone find their true calling in life and, when they find it, have the moral judgement, wisdom and strength of character to do it to their heart's content for sheer enjoyment, love, security, thrills, variety and profit.
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